Sucker!

Nick Swisher is taking Fucking Faggot Lessons From A-Rod

"Waaaaaahhhhhhhh! It hit my SHIRT!"

What a fucking douche!

Almost as good as that cocksucking A-Rod trying to FAKE a foul ball catch last night. The fucking Skankees just cannot help themselves. I hope those fucking cunts choke on their own vomit.

Fuck those cunts.

And fuck those faggot Yankee fans. I saw a dipshit kid with a PINK Yankees shirt on. Does he even know he's gay yet?

(Kids, THIS is why you don't drink 100 proof whiskey.)

Fuck You, Fox

I had to turn off the All-Star Game. Sports aren't even a refuge from the Socialist Fagger.

I simply could not stand to watch that Illegal Alien Mulatto Motherfucker on my TV. Bad enough they sucked off that fucker Bush I and the other presidents, but then the fucker tosses the first pitch and then they fellate him in the booth. It's just too much to bear.

BTW: in case you're not keeping track, the hospitals in Hawaii still won't admit which one had the "honor" of delivering him. No doc ID'd yet either. But nothing to see here!

All the while, the federal courts are still dragging their feet with procedural bullshit to prevent the cases from being heard. Cant' wait for it all to come crashing down. I'm probably too hopeful for that eventuality.

Pretty Cool Place To See a Ball Game

From the Red Sox Insider email:
And speaking of Wakefield, I have to say, seeing him announced as an All-Star on Sunday, was one of the most memorable moments in my career working here. It's not every day that I actually get to watch the games as a fan, sitting in the seats, but on Sunday, I had the chance to sit and watch the game, rather than working in the office and watching on TV. As the Sox took the field in the top of some inning (I can't even remember which it was), they announced the Red Sox players one-by-one who had been selected to the All-Star team. Wakefield, being the last alphabetically, was fittingly the last to be announced. I honestly got chills, as Carl Beane (our Public Address Announcer) said, "...and selected to his first..." Upon hearing the word "first," the whole crowd erupted in a raucous standing ovation. I turned to a couple of my co-workers who were sitting next to me and said, "Seriously, this is why we have the best fans in the world." And I really mean that.

Fenway Park simply rocks. There is something truly sweet about those old parks.

Truly Bitter Sweet.

Watching my former favorite ball player strike out by the Red Sox.

WHY, Johnny Damon? WHY did you have to go there?

Oh well. To paraphrase Bill Simmons on Pedro: "It's not Damon's fault someone out there will overpay him."

It just really sucked to have him go to the Skankees.

This Could So Be a "Made For ESPN" Movie

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/manny_ramirez_to_david_ortiz_road

Red Sox Reflections...

... another year in the books. Pretty dang close to getting back-to-back World Series appearances.

The Red Sox just didn't get it done. Their pitching wasn't good enough and they didn't swing the bat well enough either. They stranded a ton of runners and in the end it cost them.

They got beat, but thankfully not 4-1 as I feared. As much as I bitch about how the Sox could have saved me time and stress by not making it to game 7, I really enjoyed this series overall.

My biggest disappointment this ALCS was Big Papi. I had hoped his 3 run shot in game 5 was a return rather than a fluke.

I remember watching Johnny Damon struggling in 2004. He came to the plate and my brother David was dogging him. I said "home run right here". And he did it. It shook him right out of his slump. He even got that Grand Slam in game 7. (Though those might be the same play, for some reason I think they weren't. I want to say it was in the first round, I'm not sure.)

I wish Ortiz could have done the same thing this time. He just didn't have a spark this year, sad to say. I wonder how much losing Manny (that stupid rat bastard) affected his spirits.

Oh well. There's always next year.

I'm Gonna Puke...

The Red Sox just got within one run. 7-6 Tampa.

JD Drew just blasted a two run homer. I really feel sick to my stomach.

And I'm not drunk.

UPDATE: 12:09. Tie game. Youkilis up. 9th, 2 and 2 and 2 outs. Some 7 pitches for this at bat.

Now full count... crazy throw to 1st goes into the stands. Youk proceeds to second.

They're walking Bay to get to Drew.

My stomach's churning... I fucking hate sports.

FINAL UPDATE: going back to Tampa. I still feel as though I'm gonna hurl.

I really, really hate sports. But I LOVE THAT DIRTY WATER...

Just Submitted to the Sports Dude...

You and "Joe the Guy, Boston" both need to reach right between your legs and make sure you're both still guys.

Anyone that attempts to reference "League of Their Own" in a serious sports discussion has obviously had their balls removed via some sick and twisted procedure.

Get a freaking grip on your cajones, dude.

I know I'm tanked on... some number of shots of gin (I started drinking one shot per Tampa Bay runs scored in game 4 after they went up 6-1 and I lost count somewhere) but at least I know I'm still a man.

You and Joe might want to check to make sure.

Michael Maier
Indianapolis

I NEED THE SEASON PASS!

I wish I could watch every game. There's some games I'd take time off work to go home and watch if I had the Season Pass from DirecTV.

I'd get to watch stuff like THIS.

and this NO HITTER! Wow.

Baseball rocks. But without being able to watch all the games, I don't keep up even on the standings as much as I should (DANG IT! We're down to 5th best in the MLB!) cuz it just reminds me of the games I don't get to watch. And the Red Sox are on ESPN way more than most teams.

Dang it all. Stupid financial responsibilities...

OUCH!

"The visitors, who had won 10 straight and 21 of 22, were embarrassed. The Sox pounded 16 hits in the first five innings. Rockies reliever Franklin Morales recorded two outs and gave up seven runs. He was followed by Ryan Speier, who walked three consecutive batters with the bases loaded. Eddie Cicotte of the 1919 White Sox didn't do that badly
and he was trying to lose."

From HERE.

1-0! 1st inning!

WOOOOOOOOOO-HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Amazing Analysis...

Fox's broadcast team for the World Series just said both teams are going to try and win tonight.

I hope they're paid TONS of dough for such brilliance.

I Don't Think I'm Normal...

as a sports fan. The Red Sox are going back to the World Series and I feel it's bittersweet. We won by nine runs, but I can't help but keep thinking of the blown call on Kenny Lofton at 2nd base. The replay showed him safe. But they called him out. I don't even really blame the ref because of how close it was. And Manny made a great play off of the wall.

But it still feels wrong to celebrate somehow. I am so weird.

Another Copyright Violation?

From Bill Simmons' game 4 diary here: http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/071016

If you don't read his column, you're cheating yourself.

My favorite samples:

9:00: Just checked my reader e-mails and here was the latest one, from Mike in Boston: "J.D. Drew has completely ruined my Red Sox experience. I can't believe we have four more years of him. I can honestly say if I had the money, I would give the Red Sox the $60 million they STILL owe Drew, if they, in turn, would drop him. Do you think we could start a fund? You have the means to reach more people. Start it up. I swear I'll send the first $1,000 and $25 per week. The sad part is, I don't think I'm kidding!"

(Let's just say the J.D. Drew signing hasn't gone over too well.)

9:08: You know what I noticed? Fox isn't using its "Fox Trax" feature as much tonight (in which replays a pitch to see if it cracked the strike zone or not). Maybe the umpires threatened to go on strike after what happened Monday night, when Fox Trax made the Game 3 umpire come off like a drunker version of Frank Drebin in "The Naked Gun."

9:56: Shot of Dice-K staring mournfully from the dugout as Wake desperately tries to fend off the Tribe. After six months under the Boston microscope, poor Dice looks like he's constantly filming his own hostage video. But, hey, you can't possibly expect to get a sure thing for $103 million these days.

10:05: I might not be able to describe what McCarver just told us without you thinking I made it up, but let's try: Over the span of 45 seconds, he just explained that a leadoff home run leads to more multirun innings than a leadoff walk, only he made it sound like this was some sort of remarkable revelation or something. Did we just watch a sketch for Joe Buck's late-night show? That just happened, right?

(Rewinding game on TiVo.)

10:06: Yup, it just happened. So if you're keeping track at home, multirun innings happen more often when they're started off by a home run instead of a walk. Thank you, Tim McCarver.

[Me: I'm really glad he wrote that. It sort of hurt my brain trying to follow what he was saying last night. I'm so glad I'm not the only one.]

11:18: Mark from Philly offers an inspiring defense for Manny's home run preening: "When Manny went deep, my first thought was, 'Quit posing, Manny, we're still down 7-3.' Then it dawned on me that Manny probably had no idea what the score was. In fact, he probably isn't aware that baseball games are determined by which team scores more runs. Manny's only point of differentiation comes when, after hitting a home run, he sees his teammates waiting for him at home plate -- it's at that point he knows it's time to go to the strip club."

11:33: Crisp lines out to first. Three outs. Our final score: Cleveland 7, Boston 3.

I'm not willing to wave the white flag yet, but we're damned close. The reason Cleveland deserves to advance to the World Series is the same reason Colorado advanced: The baseball playoffs aren't like the NBA playoffs, in which you can keep advancing with three or four big guns carrying you. For a championship baseball team, everyone chips in from Player No. 1 to Player No. 25. You have three or four heroes per game, everyone seems like they're loose and having fun, and when you're looking back afterward, sometimes you can't even figure out which guy should have been the MVP. That's how the Red Sox won in 2004, and that's how the Indians and Rockies are winning in 2007. There's nothing more to say.

[I am totally in agreement with this one.]

The Red Sox Are Cockteases...

I was giving up in the 6th.

Then Youkilis and Ortiz knock out back to back homers.

Now I have to keep watching (it's a commercial now).

I fucking hate sports.

EDIT: Man... this sucks. 7th inning stretch and even back to back to back homers can't seem to help us much.

I'm ready to cry like Shane White reading about the next Pacers player being arrested.

Cleveland Played Good Ball Tonight

although I do hate that awful strike call on Manny. He shoulda gotten a walk.

Instead he gets a horrific called strike.

It very well may have changed the outcome of the game.

Dang it.

Such be sports.

Yeah, This About Sums It Up:

"Watching the faces of young Red Sox fans, loyally hanging in until 1:30 only to be treated to the comedic stylings of Gagne, was like seeing the family dog attack and devour a group of cute baby rabbits. Talk about a lack of return on investment; it’s difficult to imagine a worse way to drop $1,500. You just spent a grand and a half to be accused of child abuse by obnoxious, equally tired fans sitting on their couches at home, wondering how you could do this to your child. I’d say those families are in serious danger of missing church today."

WHAT THE FUCK???????

How the FUCK do the FUCKING Red FUCKING Sox FUCKING lose FUCKING THREE FUCKING GAMES TO THE FUCKING TORONTO FUCKING BLUE FUCKING JAYS?????

GOD FUCKING DAMN THE FUCKING RED FUCKING SOX!!!!!

1.5 FUCKING games ahead of the FUCKING FUCKING FUCKING FUCKING FUCKING YANKEES!

WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK????

25 Left, 6 up!

Whew... starting to breathe a bit easier. It sure ain't over yet. And if anyone can blow it... it's the Sawx.

But the numbers are nice to see right now. Although Seattle is seriously letting me down here. Bastards.