Media Bias? Nahhhhhhhhhhhhh...

Damn molesting Catholic priests...

Oh, wait a second...

Good One!

http://www.breitbart.tv/?p=7271

I wish our local news was this good...

SHANE IS RIGHT!

All the time! About everything! Okay? Are we cool now?

(I have to say that. THIS shows what happens when you piss of loony sports fans...)

"OKLAHOMA CITY, Okla. -- Aggravated assault charges have been filed against a church deacon and University of Oklahoma Sooners fan after officials say he grabbed a University of Texas fan between the legs during a scuffle in an Oklahoma bar."

and

"Neither Thomas or Beckett chose to comment, but the police report described what happened to the victim, including graphic details about his injuries that included a torn scrotal sack with partially exposed testicles."

One Reason I'm Glad I Did NOT Swim On Cape Codde This Yeare...

THE REASON

See my previous thoughts on this subject HERE and especially HERE.

And speaking of sharks, I just realized (BESIDES the fact that I know I'm about to show off just how much of a pathetic comic geek I is) that Magneto getting attacked by the shark in X-Men 188 was totally fake. He survived because his suit was made of chain mail. But if that were the case, he woulda sunk in the water while unconscious! DUH!

OH NO!

101 frightening ice cream flavors

Not 4 the faint of heart...

Note the lid on #64.

Beyond Messed Up

"Are You Raising Another Man's Child?
More than a million American men are investing their love, time, and money in a child who isn't their own. But the worst part about this betrayal? How many people may be in on it"

From here.

Interesting article talking about unfaithful women and men in denial or without a clue.

My favorite part is this: "But while men may be the primary victims of PD, women aren't the only villains. Paternal discrepancy makes liars of everyone, and that includes the people from whom we'd most expect the truth." (doctors, lawyers, etc.)

Well, the rest of the article is interesting but NONE of these folks would be in a position to lie if the woman hadn't been a lying, cheating whore first. Saying that the woman's not the only villian is rather like an arsonist complaining about the fire department not showing up soon enough.

Other than:
1) rape
2) the kid not being related to EITHER parent (hospital switched your kid), OR
3) an in-vitro screwup (also possible the kid isn't genetically related to either parent), I cannot think of ANY situation where: a) you're raising a kid that's not your and b) your wife isn't a cheating whore.

Anyone think of a scenario I've overlooked?

I know a woman that let another man raise her little girl with the impression that she was his daughter. Because she was banging someone else at the time and he didn't want her for anything other than a piece of ass once in a while.

And last I heard, he was still paying child support after being duped.

Personally, I think that upon finding out that a kid isn't yours, you should be able to legally disown that child. After all, if your wife wants to, she's going to alienate your relationship with the kid anyway and she'll have the power of the law to help her do it. All she has to do is allege fear of abuse and she's got you just where she wants you.

Hell, in most states if she alleges battery -- WITH NO PROOF!!! -- you're spending the night in jail.

What a world.

Me? I'm getting a vasectomy and using an alias.

Screw Peter Benchley anyway...

For atmosphere while reading this, go here: http://darter.ocps.net/classroom/klenk/shkpress.htm I found this on my searches (make sure to use Internet Explorer, your sound and spreakers are on and MIDI enabled on your browser, otherwise, don't waste my time emailing or commenting how "It didn't work").

Anyway....

I hate sharks. I REALLY, REALLY hate sharks. I hate sharks so much I cannot even state how much I hate them. Not as much as Jorge Bush and the Clintons, but I really do hate them.

I hate them so much because I am so scared of them. As in, right now. In Indianapolis, in a cubicle listening to Joe Satriani's "Time Machine" album. I think of swimming while on vacation two years ago. And swimming as a kid at Old Silver Beach in Falmouth, Mo Beach in Mo Beach and Mayo Beach in Wellfleet. Then I think of 1191-lb-non-winning-entries-into-fishing-contest Tiger Sharks and 30' Carcharodon carcharias getting "trapped" inside Boston Harbor. (Yeah, right. The SHARK was trapped! I think it was just hoping someone would be dumb enough to try and give it directions out of the harbor. "Okay Jawsee, you go left at the Pissa Baanaacle Rock and then AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, SHIT!! WHAT THE HELL---........(GLUB, GLUB, GLUB...)"

Now as a rational person, I know the chances are better for my hitting the lottery than getting killed by a shark. And that Tiger Sharks mostly swim in deep water for their favorite meals. And as this site (http://www.ucmp.berkeley.edu/vertebrates/Doug/shark.htm) points out: "more people are killed in the U.S. each year by dogs than have been killed by white sharks in the last 100 years."

These facts do NOT assuage my fears. It just makes me think we all need to be much more wary of dogs. (I mean, do my dad's or brother's dogs lick me to tell if TODAY's the day I taste good enough to eat?)

So I will continue to hate sharks. Not that that it matters to those cold-blooded bastards. They'll just sit there in Cape Cod Bay, waiting for my dumb ass to lower its guard and swim in the ocean while wondering "How much are gas-powered spearguns? Or stainless steel chain mail suits?".

Then I realize I don't have the money for such things. And I can only hope the feces I shoot out upon seeing the shark will work as well as the Bat-Shark-Repellant that every super-hero happens to carry in their helicopter. Or hope that some dolphin will heroically throw itself in front of the shark in the nick of time.

And finally, yes, these are the things that occupy my thoughts while I'm supposed to be working.

It seems the longer I work for the Federal Government, no one can even tell if I'm working or not.